Guns n' Roses
by Chocolatebrowneyes
Summary: If only Anamaria could see Meh now... JA adventure


Third Attempt...

Title: Gunsn' Roses

Chapter: 1 boat, two problems

Rating: PG-13

Genre: Romance/Action/Adventure

…..

Captain Jack Sparrow, great legend of the seven seas, the finest crewmember on the Black Pearl, and to many the greatest womanizing scallywag.

Jack Sparrow, even the sound of his name made Anamaria's skin crawl. Jack-Captain Jack Sparrow was a man that was known for his scandals, and for being a little rough around the edges.

But, by the time Anamaria got word, her glorious boat was nowhere in sight. Her 'Jolly Mon' was now in Jacks grubby fingers sailing over the horizon and there was nothing she could do.

Anamaria took a sip her tenth shot of rum and was going on her eleventh shot. She kept thinking it over.

How did he get away with her boat so easily?

With all this thinking Anamaria drifted to sleep with a soft thud on the bar table, not knowing someone was watching her every move.

………

Jack Sparrow took a long sip of his rum, not taking his eyes off Anamaria. He only wanted to see her one last time. After all, he was stealing her ship. She kept mumbling words of anger that amused Jack a lot.

After her tenth shot, Jack was confused and scratched his chin in bewilderment. He still didn't understand how such a little lass like Anamaria didn't pass out from drunken ness.

Most girls that got drunk-that Jack got drunk passed out on their third glass. Jack took a sip of his fifth-teeth shot of rum. He started to feel kind of woozy. Finally, on Anamaria's eleventh shot of rum, she was asleep on the bar counter.

He took this opportunity to get a closer look. He staggered toward Anamaria, feeling the effects of the rum starting to kick in.

Jack knocked over two tables, a bottle of Gin, and a waitress, while trying to get to Anamaria's sleeping figure. When he reached her, he looked around, making sure no one was in sight. He peered over at Anamaria and noticed how innocent she looked (minus the little drool line on her lip).

Jack peered closer to her, her lovely raven hair slightly over her eyes. Jack pushed a few stray strands of hair away from her face. He smirked she looked so peaceful. Jack was two inches fro her face when he heard her mumble something. He couldn't quite so he leaned closer.

"'hat jack 'parrow go'in to be dead meat," Anamaria mumbled in her sleep, unaware that Jack was standing over her at that very second.

Jack kissed her cheek and whispered in her ear, "Not if ye can catch me."

Suddenly, Anamaria's eyes fluttered slightly open. She saw Jack's face and swore she was imagining things.

"'ello luv," he grinned at her, and just like that he was gone. Anamaria's eyes opened fully.

"Jack!" she yelled. She tried to run after him but it was too late. Jack got away again. Anamaria witnessed her boat drift away in the horizon yet again.

"I'll be see'in ye soon," Jack winked at her. Anamaria grinned mischievously and tapped her pistol with her cylinder brown fingers.

"Oh very soon," She said to herself.

In one quick motion, she took out her pistol and fired three shots at her boat. Jack ducked at every shot and yelped when a shot wounded his hat. Anamaria smiled, she'd rather have her boat sink then fall in Jack's hands. She turned and headed in to get her boat back.

………

Jack sailed as far as he could go( of course he didn't know where). He just wanted the seawater breeze to kiss his cheeks. He laid flat on the deck looking at the blue sky. It was good weather, not a cloud in the sky. He sipped his rum that was hidden in his breast pocket. Jack drifted off to sleep dreaming of gals, well a certain gal.

Jack couldn't seem to get Anamaria off his mind. He kind of felt guilty for the whole boat thing. But, he was going to get her another boat after he got the black Pearl. He was lucky he had got away from Anamaria or he would have been shot.

Jack knew she would back, he just didn't know when she would.

………

Among the seawaters Jack-Captain Jack Sparrow was not alone. A great boat called the "Red Massacre" second feared to the Black Pearl sailed. Its sails were strongly built with a mighty fine crew to go along with it.

Among the crew was a captain. Captain Buck-eyed George was his name. He was a crazy man who loved women more than rum. (Well, more than Jack loved rum.)

As rough and tough as nails he was and cool charming with women. The crewmen swabbed the deck and put up fresh sails. The boat indeed was a beauty. The deck was quite with Rafael, a crewmember, as the first mate making sure everyone was doing their job.

"Sail halt!"

………

Jack Sparrow awoke from his 'lovely' dream of things only a drunk like Jack Sparrow would dream. (Something I really don't want to talk about). Well there he was a wide-awake, alert, henotheistic. He marched to the crow's nest and peered over the horizon. There 9 degrees north, a ship.

A beautiful ship almost as fine as the Black Pearl.

"Well I'll be damned," mumbled Jack. He peered closer to the horizon. Jack recognized the boat anywhere and what feared him most was that he had a couple death wishes from the Captain. Jack sighed.

"Captain Buckeye-George," he came closer to the port, "can ye day get any worse than 'his."

………

Captain Buckeye-George marched on the ship deck. His head was bald and shiny from sweat and he wore black boots that echoed on the wet deck with each staggering step he took. Captain Buckeye-George took out his telescope and peered over the horizon. He smiled; rows of rotten teeth lined his crusty lips.

He walked across the deck, boots echoing, as he peered to the horizon with his good eye. He turned to his crewmates. The crewmates grew frightened for Captain Buckeye-George only smiled when he was up to no good.

"There," he pointed with his grubby finger, "a ship."

………

Sweat was beading on Jack's forehead he needed to think of something. He tried sailing back to Torgua but Anamaria would skin him like a scallywag he was. Jack winced at the thought. The Red Massacre was just about five miles away and Jack needed to think quickly.

He searched the deck for something, anything that could save him. Jack was about to give up and turn back to Torgua and let Anamaria skin'em. But…in the sunlight Jack spotted a red dress.

It was lovely with a black corset along with black fishnet panty hoes.

"Well…"said Jack eyeing the dress.

………

Anamaria walked up and down the plank wishing that Jack would return with her ship.

"Scurvy bastard," she spat. She walked to her motel and started to undress. Anamaria felt dirty with Jack Sparrow's lips on her cheek. She blushed and touched her cheek. She pushed the thought away and began the bathe in her hot soapy water.

She towel dried her self and put on her clothes. Anamaria began to brush her hair humming a tune of her own, when she heard the loose floorboard plank creek.

Anamaria stood to retrieve her pistol but it was too late. She felt a cold knife blade press against throat and looked in the mirror to. She felt defeated; it was Ricky, Anamaria's ex- boyfriend.

He had dark brown hair with deadly green eyes that grew fierce when ever he spoken gently when he got mad. There was something about Ricky that made him want to be with Anamaria no matter what she did, including the deep love bite on his neck that Anamaria left him before she ran away.

"Ricky, what are ye do'in here?" she breathed eying her pistol on her dresser. Ricky pressed the blade closer to her throat. He smiled at her.

"Just can for a vis'it" he spoke gently angry at her disappearance. Ricky pressed the blade closer to her throat leaving a little cut in it's place. He leaned in close to her and sniffed her hair.

Anamaria looked at her pistol with desperation. Ricky began to lick the cut on her neck and then he laid soft kisses on her neck. Forcefully, Anamaria did the same. She kissed him roughly with her eye still on the pistol; it was almost in her reach. She tried to reach for it but Ricky grabbed her hand just in time.

"Tsk, tsk, tsk" he whispered and slapped Anamaria unconscious.

………

Jack cursed at himself. He put on the red dress, with the black corset along with the panty hose. He washed off the black eyeliner and cursed while he shaved his beard. Jack then, combed his hair cursing at every tangle, and the applied some lipstick.

He grinned; who knew Anamaria was into this stuff? Jack quickly looked himself over, crushing his pride and dignity. Being lady like, Jack crossed his legs and waited as the boat grew near.

………

"What tis it cap'n?" said Rafael "who's ship!" Captain Buckeye-George handed Rafael the telescope. He looked through and smiled.

Buckeye-George snatched it back "Tis is a lovely lass on the unidentified boat," Rafael said smoothing down his hair and checking himself.

"Let her up then," Buckeye-George grinned, "let ye up."

TBC….

Jack was sweating madly. The corset inched his hair chest, and breathing was getting harder to do. The vast ship towered over his tiny boat. Jack was thinking of different ways of torture that Anamaria would do to him.

The ship stopped and a small boat was let down. On it was Buckeye-George along with Rafael. Jack smiled drunkenly hoping they would complement his 'new look' he didn't want to die just yet.

"Aye, M'lady, I see you got yourself wondering in the seas," Rafael grinned. "Would you care to join us for dinner as a guest?"

Jack's stomach gave a low growl; he wouldn't get full on drinking rum. He plainly shook his head.

When Jack aboard the ship everyone stared at him. He was guessing these men hadn't seen a woman-or similar to which Jack was not, in say months. A slim sailor walked over to Jack.

"What a beautiful lass," said Lou, smiling touching one of Jacks locks of brown hair. Jack slapped his hand away. Another man roughly walked up and pinched Jack's rump.

"And fine as-," before the man could finish his sentence Jack slapped him rapidly against his cheek. The big man fell hard on the deck. Buckeye-George stormed to the situation. The crewmen angrily stood around Jack.

"What seems to be the problem?" Buck spoke, kicking Joe in the side where he laid in pain, "don't ya know how to treat a lady on board. Show some class." Jack smiled dusting off his dress.

There were low murmurs of "Yeah we should', 'I feel so ashamed,' 'Yeah, show some class,'" the crew took off their hats and smiled the most gentlemen like smiles as if they practiced this everyday.

Jack looked over his shoulder to see whom they were doing this too, but stopped when he realized they were grinning at him. He didn't like this situation it rubbed him the wrong way.

Buckeye-George took his hand and kissed it. Jack was going to snatch it back but he held it firmly.

"And what be ye love's name?" Buck smiled romantically it made Jack sick. Jack cleared his voice.

"It's-," Jack stopped that voice was too high. "Eh-erm," he cleared his voice once more. "It's..." He couldn't think of a name. "It's, Jack-," he peered at the boat lines, "a line. Jacqueline," he breathed in relief.

Buck kissed his hand again, which Jack snatched free this time. Buck looked over the crew. "Well, don't just stand there-sail!"

Anamaria awoke with a throbbing pain at her head. A cool cloth was tied on her head. Her eye had a patch over it probably concealing something. She looked around with her good eye and stood out of bed. Ricky was nowhere around.

A window was open an escape maybe. She took off the patch where it hid a small bruise. Anamaria ran her fingers over it and winced. It hurt like hell.

She walked over to the window and heard a low scraping sound. She looked down and saw a chain connected to her and the locked to the bed. Anamaria grabbed her ankle. Ricky had chained her to the bed. She screamed out loud as she clawed at it with her nails.

Ricky walked in with a cocky smile looking pleased at Anamaria's current situation. He walked over towards her and she scooted away from him. He bent down and laughed in her face with delight.

Anamaria spat in his face stifling his laughter.

Jack sat at the table looking at all the food. He reached out for almost everything, even some mystery meat. Buck laughed lowly. "Alas a girl who likes to eat."

Jack ignored his comment. He was thinking of ways to get off this cursed ship. "Mmm," was all Jack said in response to the food in his mouth. He grabbed a bottle of rum and downed the whole thing

. Members of the crew looked his way, in awe of how 'she' did it. Joe was rubbing his jaw and glaring in her direction. Dan was shaking his head and eating the mystery meat while he watched.

Jack slammed it down on the table. He looked up smiled in a mocking manner like; this caused all the crewmen to look in a different direction with a hint of blush in their cheeks.

Jack wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and sank his teeth into a piece of chicken not noticing that his lipstick smeared his face.

Buck leaded Jack to his room when dinner was over. "Here's your room," he said opening the door to the pinkest room Jack had ever seen. The sheets were pink the walls were pink…the rug-pink.

"Oh, thank you," Jack said over joyed. Buckeye-George puckered up his lips and bent in for a kiss something that Jack didn't notice until he turned around locking lips with a man. A rather foul man who used his lips for other things. (A/N: lets keep it PG-13!).

Jack backed away quickly running into his room. "Ewwww!" He wiped his mouth on the back of his hand and began a spitting fit. "Sppppppfffftt!" He leaned against the door and snatched of his dress.

Buckeye-George smiled dreamily. His mood instantly changed when he saw one of his crewmates eye him in question.

Jack looked around the room and saw a bottle of gin on the table he rushed over and sipped it, throwing himself on the pink bed.

_If only Anamaria could see meh' now..._


End file.
